wonder
walking from the garage to my back gate, lighting flickers about my head. i should keep walking, but i don't. i just stand there in the desolate alley and wonder, do you see the same sky? do you feel a yearning towards the west, as i do towards the east? do you feel an attachment to the big bowls of soup or the blanket we used to share?
logic
while sleeping next to me, you awoke one day and noted the absence of experience across my face, while i lay curled up next to you. alone in the bathroom, staring at your own image in the mirror, you ran through thoughts of the past few months. these thoughts frightened you and you began to slowly magnify our differences. i woke to you pouring yourself cereal, and smiled a rather sleepy smile at you. you looked away, as if seeing my face reminded you of a memory you'd rather forget.
but now, you cannot see my face, which is how you wanted it. you cannot see me smile my sleepy smile, you cannot see me as i wait eagerly behind your glass door, you cannot see me drink my sugary coffee, or see me resting on the rug reading magazines. you are not allowed to see me or my face, just as i was not allowed to see you or your face when you decided to run away.
romance
this process, this is not new, this tug of war, this whirlwind of emotion. i always end up dating the two headed boy, pretending to be a man, unpredictable like chicago weather, but just as enticing and mysterious.
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